Question: I came out before I knew God, then after a few years I met a boy who introduced me to his church where I fell in love with God and consequentially ran back into the closet and dated that boy. It’s safe to say that relationship with the boy only lasted 2 years. Now I have been a christian for about 4 years and I’ve met a really wonderful woman at University who I’m falling for. I want to be open about it but I’m scared that my friends and family will react even more negatively than they did when I came out previously. I also already don’t fit into my current church and have found a nice one that I enjoy going to. How should I handle this situation with enough care so as I don’t run back into the closet and am not harshly judged by anyone while still bringing glory for God?

Answered by: Kori Ashton

I dated guys too here and there and then was in the closet and out of the closet, ex-gay and then gay again.  I totally understand why friends and family had issues with my ups and downs. It was tough and I certainly did lose some credibility, but after I came out for the last time and remained out the questions faded.  I lost some friends no matter what I chose to do.

So how do you handle the situation… Stay humble showing others that you know it’s been confusing not only for them, but you as well. But also be confident that your true friends will stay by your side.  Some churches will have issues with your sexual orientation, but maybe that’s a lesson that the Lord needs you to walk through.

Hold tight to God through all of this, leaning on His grace and wisdom.  Pray before you act and realize that not everyone has to know your business.  That’s something that was tough for me to learn.

Overall, I wanted to be honest and real.  So, I made the choice to be as honest as I could be with those who were close to me. I’d say it was the best choice for me.